Embracing Your Humanity: Discovering Peace and Suffer Less

Q: Is this episode telling me to give up on changing?

No. It is telling you that you cannot change what has already arrived, which is a much smaller claim. The thought you just had is not up for negotiation. What you do next is.

Q: Do the voices in my head ever go quiet?

Not in my case. I spent years trying, and they only got louder, because they all wanted to be alive too. Now there is a committee in there getting nowhere fast and I am mostly entertained by it.

Q: What am I meant to do with my attachments?

Keep most of them. Eckhart Tolle worked out on a park bench that he still wanted food, and so does everybody. Letting go is not the same as owning nothing.

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The transcript

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acceptance · zen · present-moment

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Good morning, good afternoon, wherever you are. It's morning and afternoon somewhere, isn't it? I'm Steven Webb and this

is Stillness in the Storms and this is 101 episodes.

Last week was a bit heavy episode but it's a really important one.

And normal schedule is resuming on this episode. And this week we're talking about accepting our human condition.

Our human condition. It's about embracing our humanity. Including all the limitations, all the complexities,

all the beauties, all the feelings and emotions everything like that. Just accepting that we're human.

That's it. That's all what this episode is about. What does it really mean? So Alan Watts does a great

quote. The meaning of life is just to be alive. It is so plain and so obvious

and so simple. And yet everybody rushes around in a great panic as if it were necessary

to achieve something beyond themselves. The point is just be ourselves, be our human.

You

know, just just to be human will mean that we have emotions, we have thoughts, we have ageing. The body's

going to break down. What humans live, if they have a good life, 80, 90 years. If you're an ant,

you might live, I don't know what a week. If you're a fly you got 10 days. We just happen

to have 70, 80 years. And

if we had 400 years, and I often think this, well, what would it be like to live 400 years?

I

thought, well, that'd be pretty awesome. But I would waste 360 of them, thinking I've got plenty of time.

I still waste most of my hours each day. But

I like wasting times I enjoy what I'm doing while I'm wasting time. And that's okay. But

we fantasize about being other than human. We fantasize, oh, if I come back as an ant or I come

back as a fly, come

back as a rabbit, why

would you want to come back as a rabbit? You only eat things like, I don't know, lettuce. Who wants

to eat letters all their life? Although something's in the back of my head that lettuce is not

um something you should eat rabbits but we've done it for years and I haven't heard them complaining. But

we do that, don't we? And that's what I'm going to talk about more on this podcast. I've jumped ahead

a little bit, but I want to just say thank you to Laura, the new member in our Buy a

Coffee members area. It has a little members area, although I'm working out what kind of thing we're going to

do a bit We're going to have

like a weekly Zoom call, I think. That'd be awesome. We used to do that with another members when we

used to have the Inner Peace Academy. And I wouldn't mind resurrecting that. Problem is, I don't want to over

promise and say, why are we going to do all these things and then not deliver? Because I tend to

do that.

I tend to over exaggerate what I can do in a week.

But been 50 years old, my body's been paralysed. I've been sat down for 32 years. And

a voice in my head just goes, lazy. No, I'm paralysed. That's why I've been sat down for 32 years.

And don't those voices. Again, another thing reason for being human. The voices

just come and go they just It's like a symphony of comedy and manic depressive. And

yeah, to be human. That is it. The 10 000 voices Buddhism says. They're

all there. They're alive and well. I've tried to spend most of my life trying to silence them. But going

back to Laura, the new member. And I want to say thank you to Claudette and sangha for your donations

this week. You are awesome. You literally are, and the anonymous ones this week, you literally pay for this podcast

to exist for the hosting, the editing, and things like that. Although I do all that myself, I need the

tools to do it. So you pay for this podcast to exist. So thank you. And just before I actually

dive really deep into the podcast. Although

I've kind of started um

I just want to tell you about a book I'm reading at the moment. Everything is obvious once you know

the answer. How common sense fails us, Duncan Watts. And it's just brilliant. Who

knew that it's harder to program a robot to use the subway in

New York City than it is to put a rocket on the moon? Or rocket on Mars. And I've always

looked at rocket science as, like, really hard. It's not and In actual fact, apparently that's quite simple to do.

It's basic mathematics. Not in my mind basic mathematics, but it's mathematics. But what about

riding the subway on a busy day in New York City? Do you stand next to each other? Do you

look at each other? Where do you sit? All these unwritten rules. And it's brilliant. It's really, really...

Opening my eyes to looking at the world in a different way. And that's what I'm all about. Just show

me a different way to see it. I can see it my way. I want to see it in a

different way I want You know, it's like that's why I like artists because they show me a different way

of using materials and art and paint. My way is quite bland. So

this is what books do. They give me a different view of the world. A different worldview. And it's wonderful.

It opens up things. And

I suppose all my partners and friends and family and colleagues and

all of you, everybody, every email gives me a different view. And it's wonderful most of the time

but sometimes I get a view that I don't want. But then again, that's human. So,

okay, this podcast has gone totally off the rails. So I'm going to stay off the rails and just carry

on talking. And I hope that's okay with you because that's what the mind does. So going back to being

human, which is not totally back to the podcast, but it's kind of. So what does it mean to be

human? Well, we're just, we're trying our best. We're doing our best. We're dealing with

complex feelings that have evolved over the last. I don't know, a few millennia few I don't know,

however many years. But now we're living together in complex societies and communities and we have all these rules

and we have all these things that we got to live by. And sometimes it's not easy. Sometimes it's really,

really tough. And sometimes we mess up. Okay, a lot of the times we mess up. That's me projecting now.

But we don't want to be this, do we? We want to be something else. We want to be more

calmer If I was a rabbit, I could just be out in the fields all day and chill out. I

can live in my little run and I could do that. I want to come back as an ant I

always think of coming back as an ant Why I've never heard anybody ever say that. Why would I ever

want to come back as an ant I suppose as an ant you're free from all the problems. You've got

no mortgages or you know bills to pay. You can just break into someone's house in the corner of the

door and, you know, make a home and have loads of babies in the Closet where all the food is.

And just annoy people. And you can just run up the wall behind your mate all day long and come

back down behind your mate all day long. See, here I am fantasizing now what it would be like to

be an ant. This is what we humans do. But I just don't think we embrace it enough. Love the

fact that we have an imagination. But don't try to change it. So if I actually wished I was an

ant... And wanted to be an ant. I would then mean that I don't want to be human.

But then I suffer because I think there's a better alternative. And there isn't. There

is no alternative that You are human. You cannot be anything else. You know that there is not

I I highly suspect there wasn't a piece of paper that we could all tick which one do you want

to be when before we had the entrance exam. It's

when people say like they're proud to be a certain nationality. I'm like, did you have an entrance exam for

that? Did you tick boxes do you I'm like, I sure as hell didn't.

I wasn't even there.

You know? Maybe I was in some spiritual realm, but I have no idea

main problem we have with resisting who we are and resisting the human is that we suffer. We

suffer a lot because, like I said, we think there's alternatives. We think there's some kind of joyous realm that

we can live in.

And some kind of, if we are a certain animal we are a certain level of human, perhaps if

we were enlightened we would have no suffering. Or we had no attachments then we'd have no suffering. It's somewhat

true. But being human, you're going to have some attachments, you know. I don't want to get rid of small

minds you got a big mind, no attachments, just joyous. You just, well, big mind doesn't have joyous. But you

got big mind that has no attachments, that has no

kind of realm of wants or pushing away or anything like that. And the small mind is, I want to

be this. I want to do that. I want to feel this. I don't want to feel that. I don't

want to get rid of my small mind because... I, as Steven, can get rid of my small mind because

that's the reality of the nature of

being human. But

we can embrace the fact that big mind exists and we can step out of the small mind occasionally and

enjoy or at least have the peacefulness of no suffering.

And that's the greatest thing of being human is the fact that we got to a point where we can

be aware that we can step out of this suffering. We

don't always have to be in the complexities of life. And

when we look at something slightly different, when people open our eyes. I think it's when dia that looked up

and said, when you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.

So if we stop trying to deny this human being and

just be. Okay,

I'm human. What's the best possible awesome human I can be?

I'm sure that's what the ant's doing.

I'm sure that's what the ant's doing. Every morning, how can I be a good ant? Or the bee or

the rabbit?

I'm absolutely positive. But of course not. It probably doesn't even know it's an ant. Or maybe it does. Maybe

it's just walking around going, oh, I wish I was human. Wish I could have a car to drive around

in. I wish I could have, like, all the extra things they have. I've tasted their ice cream in the...

Well, they probably haven't tasted ice cream. That's probably in the freezer. That would kill them.

Yeah, store your food in the freezer and then ants won't eat it.

I apologize for this podcast. I'm just in one of those moods. Embrace one of those moods. It's okay. It's

really warm in the Uk at the moment and we weren't expecting this and the kids have gone back and

we're hot and I'm sitting here with a slight sweat across my brow and recording this so I'm going to

put the video on Youtube

and We have a conversation in the Uk. We talk about the weather because there's nothing else to talk about.

That's all we ever talk about in the Uk is weather. Oh, it's a good day today. Yeah, it's a

bit hot. Yeah, it's a bit cold ah So we've been talking about the topic of conversation this week in

the Uk has been it's sunny now. The kids have gone back to school. And I was sat down bosco

and parked the other day. And an elderly couple said that to me. And can't say that for very long,

can I? I'm nearly elderly myself. 50 years old. But they said they looked up and said, yeah, this always

happens when the kids go back to school. I said, yeah, but wonderful for the kids, isn't it? It means

they can actually enjoy their breaks at school. They can go outside and enjoy the sun. Oh,

yeah. Different way of looking at it.

And that's the point. If

we keep looking at things in a way that, and through the lenses of we are suffering, we can just

be human. I wouldn't feel the sun on my face if it wasn't human. I doubt the ant is thinking,

oh a lovely day. I'm going to go to the supermarket or I'm going to go to the closet and

collect some more whatever I eat and go and store it up because it's going to be raining next week.

Asking the other ants about the weather forecast and complaining,

gossiping. They probably will one day. If they are around long enough, they'll probably evolve to the No they won't.

If they haven't got there, I don't know.

But this is what it's like. This is what the brain does it's what the mind does. This is what

it means to be human. Embrace it. Love it.

You know, when we accept the fact that we're human, we have some kind of emotional freedom to play with

the ego, to

play with who we think we are. The

irony is the more mental chatter that we can witness,

the more mental clarity we have the more inner peace we have. Because we're stepping out and witnessing it. Does

that make any sense?

It's like if

you're in it, you cannot enjoy it. It's like the ice cream doesn't enjoy the taste of being an ice

cream. I enjoy the ice cream. So if I'm being me and not stepping out of it and

the experiencing the fact of being human, how can I ever enjoy it?

Interesting. I'm not sure it was that interesting actually.

And at the end of the day um jack cornford said in the end three just three things matter. How

do we live?

How well do we love? And

how much do we learn to let go?

Of course, letting go doesn't necessarily mean Living a life as a Brahmin walking down the street or

through a forest and having nothing with an empty beggars bowl. Just hoping somebody for your teaching is going to

give you a grain of rice like the Buddha got to at one point.

And I think Eckhart told he got to a point where he was on a park bench and homeless. And

he realised he was still desiring food. It's like, so I'm still attached to food. Well, hell yeah, that's what

your body needs to survive.

But it's you're not going to get rid of these attachments.

I philosophically know these things. Am I living it? No I

got plenty of stuff around my house now

got loads of stuff around me. I bought a new camera that people have donated and helped me to fund

so I can put it on the chair and I can show you a little more my explorations while I'm

out and about.

And it picks me up and makes me a little bit happier.

But I laugh about it and I step out of it and see the craziness in it all. Because it

is kind of crazy. This

whole human experience will come and go. At some point, the universe is just gonna ah die out.

At some point, the whole universe is gonna go and take his last breath and go, oh, thank Christ that's

over. Or maybe not. Maybe the universe is stressing as much as we are.

Maybe the universe is having a panic attack like we are.

An existential crisis, as they say. So

how do we embrace this human?

Just observe it. Sit down. Use meditation to watch the thoughts come and go. Be entertained by them.

Notice the feelings and wow. Like as if you've never felt that feeling before. So when anger comes up or

when frustration or a sense of guilt, look at it like it's the very first time you've experienced it. See,

of course, when children experience all these things have been human, they don't have the awareness or the knowledge to

go, ah, what's this? But they do it intuitively, don't they? I was told a story the other day

about a little girl that noticed windows that you could see out of and through the window

was what was outside. I don't know what they thought a window was up until that point. Some kind of

awesome picture that looks similar to outside. Or they probably never even looked at it to think about it. But

they were like, oh, you can see the tree and you can see the grass. And they would run to

the door and they would look out and go, it's the same thing. Oh my God, you can see through

the window. You have no idea. Come and have a look at this. Windows you see through. And

of course the parents like, yeah. And the kid's like, oh, it's magic. Wow. And

that's what we need to do with our feelings. We need to see the universe is that the magic it

is. We don't need miracles to believe in magic. Magic is literally thinking a thought up and being

aware of it. That's amazing.

Do you know what you really are? You are a collection of atoms with chemical things going on in the

brain that...

Has some kind of organization that has come from organ after organ that is built up and it's got more

and more complex to the point now that you can lean on the hedge with your neighbour and have a

gossip conversation.

You imagine if nature looked at it backwards and go, okay, we're going to evolve for a few million years

and what we're going to do with this if They go, oh, we're gonna clean up the universe. We're gonna

have some kind of really profound kind of thing no we're gonna gossip we're gonna complain

we're gonna we have this most incredible machines that we're in control of.

Yeah, you know what I'm saying. I'm

sure you know what I'm saying. How

well have you lived? How well have you loved? And how much have you let go to actually really experience

what it means to be human?

Really experience what it means to be human. So

just before I wind up this, This week's podcast. I just want you to, if

you become a little bit quieter and in meditation, you can head over to the Inner Peace Meditations. There's another

podcast I have with lots of meditations. And it just helps you to take a step back, to slow down

a little, and to observe life for what it is in the present moment. Not what's going to be later,

not what it was earlier on. None of those things are important none of those things You can't do anything

about the future right now, technically. I said technically because a voice just jumped in my head said ah, but

you can. I'm like, yes, but you can't do nothing about the past. Okay, voice said, got me there.

This is what's going on in people's heads. See, for years I tried to get rid of all the voices.

I tried to get rid of the anger. I I was going to be a pacifist and I was going

to be calm. I was going to walk the earth by kissing the earth of every step and things like

that and And I realised the voices just got louder and louder and louder until the point where I was

overwhelmed by all of them because they were all going, hey, we deserve to be alive as well. It's like,

oh, okay. So

now I am literally hundreds and hundreds of voices that all vying for my attention while they're all me

and we're all just having this wonderful committee meeting inside my head, getting nowhere fast. And occasionally I can

get them all to sit down and go, wow, look at that. And I embrace it now because it's

hilarious. It's

what it means to be human.

So what about practical steps about this? Just

observe. Watch. There's

a wonderful saying that Jesus said in Matthew 6, 34. And I had to look it up to make sure

I get it completely correct. Although the translation and things like that. I don't know how they quite got it

right because they they wrote it 300 years after his death. But I can't remember what I said at the

beginning of this podcast, let alone that. Anyway, Jesus said. Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow. For

tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of his own Absolutely.

Each voice has enough trouble of its own. Don't worry about the other one. Each podcast episode has enough trouble.

Each day, each month, each year. Stop worrying about them all. But what a different life you'd have lived

if you hadn't worried about everything. But the irony is you would not have lived a different life at all

because the worrying didn't actually do anything.

Oh, the irony. So embrace your humanness. Be human. You cannot

be anything else. You cannot be the ant. If you want to be an ant, you ain't gonna be I

was gonna say wait, but you ain't gonna be. So, yeah. There you have it. You want to be an

ant? Don't. You're human. Enjoy being human. And I think this is the real secret to life.

Embrace what is. Embrace what you are right now. Because right now you

cannot be anything else. You

cannot change the thought that you just had. You cannot change the emotion that just arose. You cannot change

anything that's in this present moment. You ain't that powerful. The irony is neither is the universe that powerful.

So

if nothing's that powerful, why are you still trying to do it? And you'll have a lot more peace, just

trust me.

I'm gonna leave with a quote by Alan Watts. This

is the real secret to life.

To be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now.

Instead of calling it work, realise it's play. Start to enjoy. I

want to say thank you to my donators this week. You are awesome. Welcome to the newest member, Laura. We're

going to start doing some Zoom calls monthly weekly um Just one a week and just getting together. I just

need a few more members. So if you're interested in that, head over to StevenWebb.uk. Buy a coffee. You can

sign up. It's six dollars a month or more. Up to you, whatever. And you'll be helping to keep this

podcast afloat. Afloat, awake, alive um Helping to pay for it, really. And

we're

going to sit down over the next two or three weeks and really dig down on what we can do

from it. And it'd be lovely to welcome back many of my old friends from the Inner Peace Academy I'd

like to revive. Similar to that, but without the pressure. Without the pressure. So take care guys.

I love you and be

an awesome human.

Embracing Your Humanity: Discovering Peace and Suffer Less

In this episode

With gratitude to

The question this answers

The heart of it

One small thing to try

Questions people ask

The transcript

One calm email.
Every Sunday.

Embracing Your Humanity: Discovering Peace and Suffer Less

In this episode

With gratitude to

The question this answers

The heart of it

One small thing to try

Questions people ask

The transcript

More honest conversations

One calm email. Every Sunday.

One calm email.
Every Sunday.